As you may have heard, Janelle Monáe's record sales increased by an astonishing 4,500% after her Glastonbury performance at the weekend. Her album's already more than a year old... which goes to show that good music sometimes gets lost amongst the chippy commercialism of those David Guettas and Taio Cruzes.
So I have no compunction about blogging again about the really-rather-excellent SBTRKT, whose single Wildfire has been knocking about for weeks without so much as a raised eyebrow. It features Yukumi from Little Dragon on vocals and it's finally got a video. You will like this. A lot.
Besuited 80s popmeisters. Fans of Studio Line hair gel. Fond of synthesized brass stabs. Once wrote a bizarrely cheery song about falling in love with a prostitute.
After they split up in 1988, one of Johnny Hates Jazz went on to pen hits for Gina G. Singer Clark Datchler recorded a solo album about the environment. They continue to survive off the royalties to global hit single Shattered Dreams, which has been played more than 3.2 million times on US radio alone.
Not to be confused with Living In A Box.
EXHIBIT B: Van Go Lion
Portland-based pop peddlers Van Go Lion are Amy Paige (vocals) and Josh Loerzel (synths and looking lost in promo photos, like Dave Stewart used to do in the Eurythmics). They are named after a character from obscure US kids show Zoobilee Zoo, which has the most annoying title sequence of all time.
By pressing a unique combination of buttons on their Apple Mac, the duo create DIY retro pop music that, unlike all other DIY retro pop music, is not rubbish. Instead, we get pared down, euphoric europop that tips its hat to The Pet Shop Boys, Hall And Oates and Billy Ocean (amazing). Here's their current single Body Moves.
To celebrate the launch of Body Moves (you can buy it on iTunes now), Van Go Lion have recorded a brilliant, housed-up cover version Shattered Dreams and given it exclusively to Discopop Directory. How bloody marvellous is that?
Better still, Johnny Hates Jazz have given the whole thing their seal of approval. Here is what they had to say:
“25 years since Shattered Dreams was originally a worldwide hit, and after nearly three and a half million airplays in the US alone, it's great that the song is reaching a new generation of music fans. We celebrate Van Go Lion's innovative new recording, and have no doubt that it will add to this continuing success.” - Johnny Hates Jazz
Did you spot the reference to how great and popular Johnny Hates Jazz are? It's very subtle so you might have missed it, but it's definitely there.
Working at Glastonbury is hard going - 18-hour days, 20 bands to interview, 20 live inserts on 6 Music and Radio 2, covering the death of a politician, and producing eight or nine other radio segments across the weekend.
But let's face it: I'm a lucky pup. I get to see and do things that only a privileged few will ever experience. The lack of sleep is a small price to pay.
So... Here's my top 10 moments from the behind-the-scenes at the world's muddiest festival.
10)The Joy Formidable. Not only did they ROCK the John Peel stage, but they started a rumour that Beyoncé would have a "giant inflatable clitoris on stage as a symbol of female empowerment". We didn't broadcast much of that interview...
9)Jo Whiley getting her umbrella stuck in a door, but still looking inconceivably glamorous.
7)U2... I didn't get to see any of their set, but this stripped-down version of Stay was a highlight of the TV coverage. It's not one of their best-known songs, but it was a subtle and tender moment in a blustering "biggest band in the world" headline set.
The song's subtitle, Far Away, So Close, reflected the general feeling that U2 had fumbled their big moment - thanks in no small part to the weather.
6) Watching Jimmy Cliff at the side of the West Holts stage as he got ready to perform. The 63-year-old reggae star limbered up by spinning his arms like a human windmill, dressed in a chain-mail tracksuit with gold lamé shoes. And what an incredible set he delivered...
5) When Plan B went AWOL 30 minutes before a live interview on Radio One. We had to scramble the emergency phone lines to find another guest, ringing anyone who might have their hands on a pop star. Kaiser Chief Ricky Wilson eventually came through (and was brilliant on air) but not before Steve Lamacq wandered past, laconically noting: "It's ironic that you need a Plan B for Plan B".
4) Sneaking out into the audience for 15 minutes of Elbow - just as they performed my favourite song, Mirrorball. Guy Garvey gave the most affable performance of the weekend, holding the crowd in the palm of his hand with some perfectly-judged bandinage between the songs. I got to be part of his "reverse mexican wave", a beautiful moment of communion between band and audience.
3) Standing next to Beyoncé as she waited to speak to BBC TV. She was totally buzzing from her spectacular set on the Pyramid Stage, glowing like a gorgeous R&B firefly.
We were stood as close as the first "W" and the final "E" of this sentence and, if she hadn't been ushered onto the set, I might have gone all Alexandra Burke and started weeping like an idiot. The interview was incredibly sweet, though. As Olly Richards said on Twitter afterwards: "Beyonce seems lovely. I bet she & Jay-Z just sit at home being brilliant and not feeling a need to make it a big thing."
2) Everything about Janelle Monae. The pin-sharp choreography, the stunning voice, the monochrome stage set (everything was black and white, right down to the string section's instruments)... even the bit where she brought out an easel and started painting in an unexpected tribute to Rolf Harris. Possibly the most gifted and individual performer of the weekend.
1) Interviewing Robert "Kool" Bell of Kool & The Gang. Our chat ended like this...
Me: "You're on stage at the same time as Beyoncé. Do you feel any competition? Who's going to be more funky?"
Kool: "It's interesting that they've put us on at the same time, but I think we have enough people out here. And we gonna get down".
Me: "How do you get down?"
Kool: "We get down... on it."
There were other moments, too... Getting to stand in the wings as Cee-Lo played his set. Having to ask The Vaccines to write their names on a piece of paper, because I kept getting them wrong on air. And the backstage catering, which was of an unfairly high standard compared to the falafel vans on the main site (a special shout-out to whoever made the sticky toffee pudding).
There will be a short break in service while I report at, then recover from, a large music festival in the middle of England. You might hear me if you tune in to 6 Music... but not during Adam & Joe (*pouty face*)
Sadly, work commitments mean I won't get to see Beyoncé's headline set on Sunday night. I think we can all agree she's going to own Glastonbury, though. And here's why... Even when she dashes off an obligatory Destiny's Child number, she's 20 times the performer you or I or "Chris Martin" will ever be.
If you're festival-bound yourself, I'm mainly reporting from the John Peel tent (highlights: DJ Shadow, The Joy Formidable, Noah And The Whale, Example, Robyn, Foster The People). If you see someone holding a 6 Music microphone with the manic expression of a feral lemur, come over and say "hi".
1) Nicola Roberts's very good solo effort has basically "stiffed" and no amount of gushing coverage in Sunday broadsheet style supplements is going to get it into the top 10, ok?
2) Cheryl Cole's last album was the sound of a yawn being stifled.
3) Kimberley Walsh can only stand around looking beautiful for so long.
4) We are not sure what Sarah Harding does any more. (Dating In The Dark does not count as "doing something" when you used to be in the UK's best pop group of the 21st century.)
5) Nadine Coyle has been reduced to recording songs in one of those photo karaoke booths in a US shopping mall.
Britney Spears has a chequered history when it comes to videos. For every technicolor dance spectacular (Toxic), there's a drab, soul-less dirge (Gimme More). The worst ones always seem to feature Britney "cutting loose" and "being herself" in "the club" - cf the forced jollity of Do Somethin'.
Her latest single is I Wanna Go and it falls directly between these two stools, causing some nasty bruising to the cocyx. Here's a breakdown:
FOR
AGAINST
Totally unnecessary swearing
Britney "acting"
Thriller reference
Terminator reference
The bit with the milk
The bit with the paparazzi
Britney pretending to whistle
Tedious "sexy" lyrics
Nice bikini
It was all a dream
Basically, it's 50% brilliant and 50% "eh?". Watch below...
