Wednesday, April 18, 2012

12 solid FACTS about Cheryl Cole's new music

1) A SINGLE WILL BE UNVEILED ON FRIDAY
How do we know: Because it says so on Cheryl's newly-relaunched website. To be precise, it says Call My Name will be played "from 8:10am on all UK radio". Which is quite a bold statement, when you think about it.

2) IT WAS PRODUCED BY CALVIN HARRIS
How do we know: Calvin hinted at his involvement when he posted a picture from the video shoot, saying "Can't wait to see this". His production credit was later confirmed in the "tabloid press".

3) CALL MY NAME IS UPTEMPO
How do we know: Music website That Grape Juice described it as "an alleged electro tinged dance floor romp with a 4-on-the-floor breakdown". They clearly haven't heard it but if you had to describe the key components of the Calvin Harris oeuvre, you couldn't do much better than that.

4) THE VIDEO CONTAINS IMAGES OF CHERYL IN VARIOUS OUTFITS PERFORMING THE SONG
How do we know: Because she has been teasing fans with photos from the video shoot, which took place in Los Angeles earlier this month under the watchful eye of Anthony Mandler (Beyonce, Nicki Minaj, Rihanna). In these pictures, Cheryl is alternately missing her coat and her trousers. Isn't it annoying when that happens?



5) THE LYRICS MAY OR MAY NOT BE ABOUT DANCING
How do we know: In February, Cheryl posted something that looked like lyrics on Twitter. "You know it turns me on when the beat starts dirty dancing.. The way it calls to me I can almost feel its rage.. La da da da da Dum Dum.."

While these might not be from a single (or even an album track, assuming a few songs have been rejected) the lyric "La da da da da Dum Dum" clearly puts Cheryl on the fast track for an Ivor Novello award.

6) THERE ARE RELEASE DATES IN PLACE
How do we know: Because Cheryl announced it this afternoon. Call My Name is out on June 10. The album is out on June 18.

7) THE ALBUM IS CALLED A MILLION LIGHTS
How do we know: See above.

8) AN ALBUM SAMPLER HAS BEEN PRESSED AND WATERMARKED
How do we know: Cheryl's PR team tweeted about it ages ago. It comes with a stylish clear plastic sleeve, with a bonus yellow post-it note to protect prying eyes from the TOP SECRET song titles. This security measure was devised by the FBI.


9) THIS RECORD IS THE RESULT OF A LOT OF HARD WORK
How do we know: Let's just say the album was put together with a lot less haste than Messy Little Raindrops. We expect it will be more coherent as a result.

10) LANA DEL REY IS INVOLVED.
How do we know: Because The Sun says so. According to their article, which is based on quotes from an unnamed source, "the record label are pretty happy about it because Lana has a massive following." A massive following, you say? Unlike, for example, Cheryl Cole? What a strange sentence. Anyway, a press release for the record confirms the Del Rey connection once and for all.

11) WILL.I.AM IS INVOLVED
How do we know: Because he is her manager, you nitwit.

12) ER.... THAT'S IT.
So here is a picture of Cheryl in a tunnel.


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