Here is the "prettified" version of Marina and the Diamonds' new video

Notorious gargoyle Marina Diamandis tweeted on Monday that her record company had delayed her new video because she "looked ugly".

"So, someone at my record label wont let me release the video bc I look ugly in it apparently," wrote the pop star. "We need more $/ time to paint out ugly parts."

Now, let's be blunt: Marina is a total babe. Even though, as she let slip in the Sun this week, she's been wearing a wig for the last 12 months because someone broke all her hair off.

Perhaps in the original cut of the video there was a giant booger hanging out the end of her nose. But I imagine that, when the record label said "you look ugly", what they meant was "you are not showing enough cleavage". Because that is what they always mean.

Anyway, the booger has been removed, the cleavage has been enhanced and the throbbing goiter on Marina's neck has been airbrushed out. Now we can all sit back and enjoy the completed version of the video, safe in the knowledge that the music industry's attitude to women is as depressingly primitive as it was in the 1960s.

Marina And The Diamonds - How To Be A Heartbreaker

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