Paging Justin Timberlake's lawyers

I know we're all very upset that Justin Timberlake has decided that making music isn't as much fun as dicking around on movie sets and playing golf, but do we really have to express our anguish via a series of increasingly inferior rip-offs of Like I Love You?

First it was that Justin Bieber single (hateful), then "Conor Maynard" stuck his oar in (hateful^{10,473,661,05}), now bloody JLS are having a go.

Their new single, Hottest Girl In The World (urgh) works so well musically that it could almost be an out-take from the Justified sessions. What lets it down is the lyrics. Would JT ever sing anything as corny as "if you should ever wonder why these dudes all fall in line, it's because they see that sexiness has finally been defined"?

Well, yes, he probably would. But it wouldn't be so skin-crawlingly, bite your knuckles off embarrassing.

JLS - Hottest Girl In The World

Next up is "dope" recording artiste Tyler James. He's recorded a mega R'n'ballad called Cry Me A River Single Tear, showing off those truly stunning falsetto riffs he used to great effect on The Voice.

But the debt to Cry Me A River is so undeniably gigantic that he even copies the whole betrayed-by-a-girl / filming-yourself-having-a-bit-of-hanky-panky themes of Justin's video. I bet he denies it's about Britney Spears, and everything.

To be fair, Tyler is the artist who's most likely to succeed in riffing on the Timberlake sound - his performances have all the warmth and sincerity that's missing from the other efforts. If only he didn't look like Boycie off Only Fools And Horses.

Tyler James - Single Tear

How about we just leave this stuff to the professionals next time?

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