The Killers have ruined Christmas

"Joel, Joel, the lump of coal
Happy as a lump can be.
He just wants to keep Santa warm
And make the elves cosy"
The Killers' ninth annual Christmas single is a semi-parody of Rudolph The Red-Nosed Reindeer, co-written with US chat show host Jimmy Kimmel.

It is also unremittingly awful, unless forced whimsy and hamfisted metaphors happen to be your thing. In which case you have my sympathy.

Still, nice sweaters.

The Killers - Joel, The Lump of Coal

If that didn't get you in the festive spirit (and it didn't) you could do worse than listening to Ariana Grande's Crimbo Effort, Santa Tell Me, which is basically the Fisher Price version of All I Want For Christmas Is You.

It is embedded below, for your viewing convenience.

Ariana Grande - Santa Tell Me

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