The Saturdays' lyrics: Not exactly watertight

Notorious, the new single from The Saturdays is unexpectedly good. The video, in which they dress up as sexy secretaries and do slow-motion sex faces, is hardly the irrefutable statement on women's rights they appear to think it is, but it's no disaster, either.

Instead, it's the lyrics that let the side down. Allow me to illustrate:

:: "My resumé says I'm a bad girl"
Why would you put that on your resumé? This is bad career advice for young women. A more accurate lyric would be, "My resumé says I can type 120 words per minute and create spreadsheets in Microsoft Excel. I also make tea."

:: "I'm an outlaw"
Pffft. You are Mollie from The Saturdays. At worst, you've had a verbal warning for being drunk and disorderly.

:: "I'm a gangster on the dancefloor"
What exactly does a gangster do on the dancefloor, anyway? Deal drugs? Bribe police officers? Dance with a shifty, paranoid gait? This metaphor does not work.

:: "I'm Notorious"
Oh, The Saturdays. I'd accept "I'm frequently recognised in Tesco's fresh produce aisle"; "I'm comfortably hovering at around 240,000 followers on Twitter"; "I'm readily available for ITV2 panel shows"; or "I'm largely unremarkable but making a good career for myself through product endorsement deals".

But "I'm notorious"? Sorry, but no.

Just no.

Saturdays - Notorious

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