Wednesday, January 2, 2008

Top 10 Discopop albums of 2007

Happy New Year! And, looking forward at our past, here are the top 10 albums from the Discopop Towers ghettoblaster in 2007.

1) ROBYN - ROBYN



Sounds like: Early Madonna, with better jokes.

The critics say: “Is it any good? No. IT IS FUCKING BRILLIANT!” (popjustice)

We say: Okay, so this came out in Sweden three years ago but it’s still the freshest, deadliest pop album to hit these shores in aeons. Robyn pens a killer hook, but her real skill is in the lyrics, which can be heartbreaking (“It’s a good thing tears never show in the pouring rain”), sentimental (“I would knit you mittens and make you pie”) or out-and-out comedy (“I’ll make your balls bounce like a game of ping pong”). One for the rewind button every time.

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2) ARCADE FIRE - NEON BIBLE



Sounds like: Twelve monks who are, like, really depressed about the future.

The critics say: “A magical kingdom of noise that's equal parts Disney's Fantasia and Echo & The Bunnymen's lavish Ocean Rain.” (Q magazine)

We say: Post-millennial angst you can sing along to. Planes crash into buildings, families are ripped apart by war, a big black tidal wave comes to wipe out the population. Not the cheeriest album of the year, but certainly the most epic.

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3) CSS - CANSEI DE SER SEXY



Sounds like: A kids party in a mental asylum.

The critics say: “Lots of handclaps, woo woo backing vocals, and laughs amid funny observations about contemporary urban hipster life reveal an assured and charming debut.” (Stylus magazine)

We say: Hey, it’s another album that’s technically three years old. Did I ever say I was a hip and with-it indie scenester? No, I did not.

Anyway, CSS are brilliant. Bouncy, stupid and colourful – they could only have come from Sao Paolo. The lyrics verge on nonsense (“Am I a mouse? Am I an elephant?!”) yet often reveal something deeper on repeated listens. But Cansei De Ser Sexy (tired of being sexy) is mostly designed for jumping up and down to in a student disco with a bacardi breezer and an ironic t-shirt. Ah, the memories.

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4) AMERIE - BECAUSE I LOVE IT



Sounds like: A modern r&b record that knows its roots.

The critics say: “It would be no exaggeration to call Amerie one of the greatest singers in pop music. Her vocal performances are extraordinary: she catches the fleeting thrills and momentary rushes of intensity that permeate otherwise mundane days, and stretches those feelings out across four-minute songs without ever letting up.” (The Guardian)

We say: R&B is in a bit of a lull these days, which is why it’s so utterly criminal that this sparkling firecracker of an album did so badly. The record company hasn’t even bothered to release it in the US, which means it could be one of the great lost records of our time.

Amerie, who takes on a great deal of the writing duties for her third album, has a fantastic understanding of her soul music forebears and pays tribute to the likes of Smokey Robinson, Issac Hayes and Dozier-Holland-Dozier throughout. Not that this is a Winehouse-esque pastiche of latter-day r&b. Every lesson she learned from those masterminds of composition has been updated and spun in new directions, underscored by that fantastic voice. 2007 didn’t have a better soul workout than Gotta Work, a funkier guitar line than Take Control, or a more sugary pop confection than Crush.

Seriously, you have got to buy this album.

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5) GIRLS ALOUD - TANGLED UP



Sounds like: A girl band growing up.

The critics say: “Unbeatable future pop hits.” (NME)

We say: It didn’t seem possible a year ago that a band who would release a tired, by-numbers cover of I Think We’re Alone Now would emerge re-invigorated to produce an album this fresh. The traditional Girls Aloud formula still stands – preposterous song structures, brain-eating hooks – but the mood is a little more melancholy than before. Call The Shots, their best single since Biology, is a minor-key pop wonder, while future single I Can’t Speak French is a sultry mid-tempo sleazefest. Top marks all round.

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6) RADIOHEAD - IN RAINBOWS



Sounds like: A Radiohead album.

The critics say: “The first time I listened to Radiohead's In Rainbows, I loved it, no holds barred. Joy warmed my ears as the album's 10 songs poured forth from a freshly unzipped download.” (Los Angeles Times)

We say: I didn’t wet my pants quite as readily as everyone else, but In Rainbows is a fantastic album, and probably the most direct record Radiohead have released since The Bends. You can hear what Thom Yorke is singing, you can hum most of the tunes, but you’d still be hard pressed to replicate most of the songs on an acoustic guitar. The ones that you can, however, are stunning . Among them are Nude, Faust Arp and Reckoner – some of the most beautifully haunting ballads the band have ever written.

On another note - I never thought I’d see the day when Thom Yorke cribbed lyrics from Madonna’s Justify My Love. But on House Of Cards he really does sing “I don’t want to be your friend, I just want to be your lover”. Amazing.

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7) DRAGONETTE - GALORE



Sounds like: Goldfrapp snogging Britney Spears in a strip club toilet.

The critics say: “A 21st Century Eurythmics” (Uncut)

We say: This one crept in under the radar and burrowed its way into our mind with the cunning use of big, fat choruses from planet singalong. Dragonette, a Canadian band managed by the team behind the Scissor Sisters, plough a similar furrow to their New York counterparts. That is to say, glittery synth-driven pop with an undercurrent of sleaze. My particular favourite is Competition – a song about stealing someone from their girlfriend by being better in bed (“Goodness I like this, being your mistress,” purrs singer Martina Sorbara). No-one seems to have heard of them, and the album is rarer than a French beefsteak, but I still love it.


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8) SIOBHAN DONAGHY - GHOSTS



Sounds like: A ginger Kate Bush.

The critics say: “Nobody else in 2007 is making records this bold, this big-hearted and this defiantly different.” (Digital Spy)

We say: Siobhan, the first former Sugababe, surpassed the ambition and invention of her former colleagues this year but she paid the price for releasing such a wayward, complex album without the calling card of a radio-friendly single. If you’re going to be Kate Bush or Tori Amos, you need a Wuthering Heights or Cornflake Girl to alert people to your presence. But for those prepared to investigate, this is pop on a grand scale: sweeping strings, icy melodies and choruses like a warm bath (I’m not quite sure what that means, but I think you get the point).

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9) TIMBALAND - TIMBALAND PRESENTS SHOCK VALUE



Sounds like: Robot hip-hop from the only producer in the game.

The critics say: “It would be more accurately titled Timbaland Presents Slight Confusion or Timbaland Presents an Uneven Mess.” (Allmusic)

We say: Admittedly, only 11 of Shock Value’s 19 tracks still exist on my iPod, but those tracks are stunning. And, even when the album fails, you have to give Timbaland credit for attempting to broaden his musical palette. Rather than go down the Dr Dre route of calling up all his famous mates (although Justin and Nelly do appear), he has roped in The Hives, Fall Out Boy and Elton John to create some of the album’s stand-out tracks.

My favourite, however, is the UK-only bonus track – Come Around – which features underground rap star M.I.A. Her slinky delivery is, for once, not drowned out by superfluous sound effects and rave sirens as Timbaland gives a masterclass in how to frame a woman’s vocals. The song is only let down by the hip-hop supremo’s own rapping which, at its best, is hopeless. “Baby girl, you and me / Need to go to your tipi”. Oh dear.

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10) RIHANNA - GOOD GIRL GONE BAD



Sounds like: A collection of songs assembled by big-name r&b producers and sung by a very lucky lady from Barbados.

The critics say: “Beyonce's superstar status is not in danger, but she should hand her A&R man a copy of this album.” (The Observer)

We say: Umbrella is great. Don’t Stop The Music is great. The rest of Good Girl Gone Bad is very good assembly-line pop. You don’t learn anything about Rihanna, the 19-year-old musical phenomenon with a pretty nose, whose whiny voice will almost certainly begin to grate by the second half of the record. And, with the exception of the one about the precipitation-repelling device, you won't be singing any of these songs three years from now.

If I sound like I don’t like Good Girl Gone Bad, it’s because I’m a little frightened of what it represents – that lots of money can buy you a hit album regardless of your talent. So, while this is my 10th most listened-to album of the year (this list is based on my iTunes play counts) I’d prefer to give the “award” to Stargate, Timbaland, Redzone and all the other production teams, rather than Rihanna who had her photograph taken for the picture on the cover.

...And on that grumpy note, let’s look forward to the next 12 months of music!

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Sunday, December 30, 2007

The Discopop top 10 singles of 2007

If you don't own these, you're probably a paedophile.

1) Amerie - Gotta Work


An updated, improved version of One Thing, Gotta Work stomps all over the dancefloor like a giant in hotpants. Using a sample of Isaac Haye's Hold On, I'm Coming, Amerie crafted a case study in melodic composition - there's not a single wasted note across three minutes and eleven seconds. Why this didn't get to number one, I'll never know.
:: Watch it on youtube

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2) Robyn - With Every Heartbeat

"Still dying with every step I take, but I don't look back," sings Robyn as With Every Heartbeat opens. It's the most emotionally honest, bitterly painful song of the year - if not all time. The bit where the string quartet kicks in will break your heart a thousand times over. Her acoustic performance of the song on Radio One probably drove several teenagers to poetry or that weird sobbing where you make a noise like Hannibal Lecter when you breathe in. But you can dance to it, too, which must turn school discos into a dangerous playground of tears and snot. Brilliant.
:: Watch it on youtube

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3) CSS - Let's Make Love and Listen To Death From Above

The best drunken come-on of the year, Let's Make Love sees Lovefoxxx making a stupid, Bridget Jones-style attempt to get a man into bed. The song doesn't record whether or not she was successful, but I definitely would.

According to Wikipedia, the hook "is probably a reference to the Canadian band Death From Above 1979, as evidenced in the song's video where band members are shown wearing elephant masks (a reference to the "elephant heads" on the cover of Death From Above 1979's album You're a Woman, I'm a Machine)." So now you know.
:: Watch it on youtube

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4) Rihanna - Umbrella

In which 19-year-old Robyn Rihanna Fenty transformed from a vaguely-interesting Barbadian R&B lady into a globe-straddling pop behemoth before our very eyes. This despite the fact her singing voice is more nasal than an anteater, and that the opening rap from Jay-Z is the very definition of "phoned in". But this record is so amazingly catchy that it has changed the way we pronounce the word umbrella for the rest of all time.
:: Watch it on youtube

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5) Girls Aloud - Call The Shots

If Rihanna mangled her pronunciation of umbrella, Cheryl Tweedycole put the word "now" through a primeval torture device in Call The Shots. Seriously, it ends up being seventeen syllables long or something. But I love this song, and anyone who says they don't love it too it is lying through their dirty mouth.
:: Watch it on youtube

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6) Groove Armada - Song 4 Mutya

Despite the lyrics, Mutya almost certainly doesn't know all the words to Prince's Hot Thing, but this pop song, full of meaty synths and New Order guitar lines, sounds exactly like the sort of thing the little purple man would have written for one of his filthy protegés in the mid-80s. The video is a crock of shit, though.
:: Watch it on youtube (but it's probably best not to waste your time)

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7) Beyoncé and Shakira - Beautiful Liar

Two of pop's shoutiest ladyfolk have a volume competition over a slinky, arabesque beat. The video contains several scenes of wiggling. It is altogether smashing.
:: Watch it on youtube

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8) Girls Aloud - Sexy! No, No, No...

Nadine has a "d-d-dirty mind", she helpfully tells us in this hymn to sexual caution. Coincidentally, two years ago she used the lyrics of Biology to advertise her "dirty brain". We, the public, demand more information about this inner pervert.
:: Watch it on youtube

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9) Siobhan Donaghy - Don't Give It Up

It is a terrible crime that, despite having released one of the most inventive albums of the year, Siobhan Donaghy is now dying from Aids (on stage in a crappy "reinvention" of Rent, fact-fans). This song, equal parts Kate Bush and Bjork, is absoulte nonsense - but very beautiful, stately nonsense with an ethereal vocal. No doubt it was deemed "too demanding" for the cretins that listen to Radio One. If only she had put "The" in front of her name, they might have paid attention.
:: Watch it on youtube

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10) Nelly Furtado - Say It Right

One of those songs that sits unloved and overshadowed on its parent album before revealing its true glory as a single. A slinky little minor-key ballad, its one of Nelly's more atmospheric songs, although I've never really paid attention to what it's all about. According to the internet, however, the lyrics go: "From my hands I could give you something that I made / From my mouth I could sing you another brick that I laid". Nelly Furtado is nuts, isn't she?
:: Watch it on youtube

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PS: As ever, the top 10 list is put together using my iTunes play counts and a bit of maths(!) to even out the bias towards songs that have been around all year.

PPS: Honourable mentions also go to The Klaxons - Golden Skans, White Stripes - You Don't Know What Love Is, Gossip - Standing In The Way Of Control, Take That - Shine, Mark Ronson - Stop Me, The Ting Tings - That's Not My Name, Kanye West - Stronger, Arcade Fire - Intervention, Timbaland ft Justin Timberlake and Nelly Furtado - Give It To Me, New Young Pony Club - The Bomb.

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Wednesday, May 9, 2007

New Siobhan Donaghy video

Siobhan Donaghy’s last album left me cold, so it’s a pleasant surprise to find myself getting goosebumps every time I hear some more of her new material.

Her next single, So You Say, is no exception. It’s a powerful little ballad – more mainstream than the kooky twittering of Don’t Give It Up, but none the worse for it.

I don’t know why the video director made her swallow a lightbulb, though…

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Wednesday, April 11, 2007

10 Things You Didn't Know About Siobhán Donaghy*

1) When the Sugababes had their first hit with Overload in 2000, Siobhán was just three years old.
2) She quit the band after a fight where Mutya held her down while Keisha sprayed squirty cheese up her frock.
3) Siobhán's real name is Simon Potato.
4) Her ringtone is currently DJ Otzi's Hey Baby.
5) Siobhán plays recorder, guitar, piano, kazoo and the amazing hamster organ.
6) Her new single, Don't Give It Up, refers directly to the land-grabbing policies of Zimbabwean President Robert Mugabe.
7) Siobhán thinks Robbie should rejoin Take That. "I think Robbie should rejoin Take That," she says.
8) On three separate occasions, Siobhán has sneezed and a spaghetti hoop has flown out of her nose.
9) She can write Latin with one hand while writing Greek with the other. She can also shell peas with her feet and speak language out of her mouth.
10) Amazingly, Siobhán Donaghy is an anagram of Petula Clark.

Siobhán's amazing new single is out this week, and is worth all of the 79 pennies you will have to spend in order to buy it. Here's the video, in case you missed it last time round:


*Because they aren't true

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Thursday, January 25, 2007

Big Ginger Video

Here is the new video from the first ever former Sugababe, Siobhan Donkey.

The song is called Don't Give It Up and I am seriously impressed.

Kudos to Siobhan's record label (Parlophone) for allowing her to release such a haunting, soaringly beautiful ballad instead of forcing her to record a plastic cover version of, oh I don't know, Got To Be Certain or something.

Also - nice frock.

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