Pop Wars 1999: The winner!

So, who were these musical behemoths poised to bring down pop music?
Why, they were pint-sized pop strumpets Britney Spears and Christina 'Xtina' Aguilera.
The reason that no-one really gave this much thought was that, at the time, Britney clearly had the upper hand. Baby One More Time was one of the best songs ever written, what with its insistent piano hook and Britney's unique phrasing on the opening line Oh Bayeb-uh bayeb-uh. It also had a pervy video.
But, argued musicologists, Christina had a better voice. Psfft, we said, what use is that when you don't have the tunes, man?
Well, seven years later the dust has settled. Which strumpet did win? Let me explain with this handy comparison:

So Christina is the overall victor - and her new single really is brilliant. Its called Ain't No Other Man and sounds like a 1920's jazz number sung by Aretha Franklin then filtered through an old skool hip-hop ghettoblaster.
And, like a lovely present from the lord, it has leaked onto the internet so you can
You will find it on this fansite (but beware, it's full of horrible pop-up adverts). Failing that, try Rock Candy
Labels: Britney Spears, Christina Aguilera, humour, Music