If you keep pulling faces, the wind will change and you'll look like that for ever

Michael Jackson has been out with his kids in London (he took his family to see the Billy Elliot musical, then asked the cast back to his hotel room - doesn't he ever learn?)

As you can see from the photo, he's still making his kids cover their faces in public. Looking at it positively - Michael does seem to be going to great lengths to protect his offspring from the kind of media attention that's made his adult life a misery. But you can't help asking yourself whether these kids are hideously deformed freaks. Maybe, through some kind of awful genetic experiment, their faces morph every five seconds like that girl in the video for Black and White.

And if Jackson simply must cover their faces with tea-towels for every public engagement, isn’t it a bit cruel to nick-name the middle one "Blanket"?

Britney's bra has been pulled off (ebay)

Crazy scientists make dolphins sing the theme tune to Batman We assume they've gone for the brilliant 'dinner, dinner, dinner, dinner BAT-MAAAN' theme, and not the tuneless funk bollocks Prince wrote for the Tim Burton movie.

I've seen this clip from catchphrase 84 times now, and I still laugh milk out of my eyes every time. What's Mr Chips doing now? (right-click and select Save As... to download).

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