Drugs: They fuck you up

Keane's lead singer, Tom Chapman, has checked into the Priory to be treated for drug and alcohol abuse.

Do you realise what this means? It means that all of the band's dreary piano ballads were written on a heady cocktail of cocaine, psychedelic LSD trips and Jack Daniels sniffed off the back of a labrador.

Just how boring would they have been if he was sober?

For the sake of the fans, Tom, I beg you to snort more drugs up your nosehole.

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