Robbie's new single: Super or shit?

It's all very well being Robbie Williams and getting radio to "play" your "single", Rudebox, at the drop of a hat, but is the song any bloody good? Here is a scientific measurement:

Super:

Not as turgid as any of the tracks on his last 3 albums

Samples Boops (Here We Go) by Sly & Robbie

Contains the lyric "Take both pills - fuck The Matrix"

Shit:

Still not as good as the rap bit at the end of Kids

Not as good as Boops (Here We Go) by Sly & Robbie

Contains the lyric "Make your body shake like you're stood on a landmine"

Oh, and also...

Robbie delivers every line in a manner that suggests he is so bored he would rather be pissing on his own face

The title is a sub-par schoolground euphemism for "twat"

To my eternal joy, I have a promo CD of this masterpiece, which has arrived at Discopop Towers a mere four weeks after everybody else got their copy. Would you like it? Because I really don't.

The first person to email robbie@discopop.co.uk with proper justification for wanting to own this musical atrocity gets it posted through their rudebox by the end of the week.

Tweet