Who the hell is Taio Cruz?

Great name, but who is he? Here is a list of things people have been saying about the up-and-coming British R&B star. Some of them are probably true:

There are several things people are saying about Taio Cruz, some of which are actually true:

1) He is "the new Craig David"
2) He recorded Umbrella before Rihanna, then had it stolen from under his nose by Jay-Z
3) History does not record why he was keeping the song under his nose, which is an area of the face better suited for sporting a moustache
4) He has been making music with troubled singer Britney Spears
5) Not that kind of music, you understand
6) Although who is to say he isn't acquainted with Spears' crusty duvet?
7) After all, she is hardly very choosy these days
8) By the way, crusty duvet isn't a euphemism for Britney's lady flower
9) Anyway, Taio also wrote Will Young's naff-o-rific Your Game single
10) He is "the new Babyface," says Dallas Austin
11) Taio's new single, Moving On, is hovering just outside the Top 40
12) He is not enamoured with the UK's urban music scene, and recorded his album in the US
13) Ironically, he does not enjoy CSI: Miami, preferring the home-grown charms of ITV's The Bill
14) Taio's favourite shapes are the oblong and the paralellogram
15) He is the "new New Young Pony Club", making the current New Young Pony Club the Old New Young Pony Club

Anyway, that single is actually quite good. You can tell it was recorded in the US, because it sounds like real R&B, and not like Jamelia's last album. He did a lovely acoustic version of it on Trevor Nelson's Radio One show last week, which you can listen to - or download as an MP3 - here.
[Taio Cruz - Moving On (acoustic)]

The video, however, is British all the way. By which I mean it is terribly cheap.

Tweet